UNorg Chart

I hate unorganized events. I mean, really hate that. If you are going to have an event, it should be organized. Every T crossed and every I, dotted. I worked at a "Quote--Unquote" women’s trade show last night at a local bar. They do this thing like every 6 months, where they have vendors set up, drink specials for ladies and drawings for free stuff from the vendors. The sign hanging from the ceiling saying "Ladies Night, Ladies Only" was handmade with markers and what looked like a plastic table cloth. The flyer advertized 'roving appetizers' which I believe to mean, strolling apps...there were none. They did advertise the chocolate fountain, which was there. They put two jewelry dealers in the same small room, instead of splitting them up in the separate rooms. And I think I got roped into doing a pampered chef party while visiting the other vendors.

So, the dance studio asked me to work it. I was available, so I did because I am in desperate need of students at this point. We are also doing an entire weekend of free classes to raise money for MDA, and it’s a good cause, so I wanted to spread the word about that. So, I get there, I find my table, set up my stuff and wait. It’s not anyone’s fault that no one hardly came to this event. Oh wait, I totally take that back. It’s the bars fault for not advertising correctly, and having their sh*t together. So I sit through 4 hours of nothing and am ready to leave. Well, back up. First I am told I will be teaching a short lesson, however, NO ONE who works there can tell me what time this lesson is happening and where in the bar this is happening. The DJ is announcing this a few times, so I go ask him. He says, "I have no idea". UMMM? OK? So I say, "Where is this lesson happening? Are you moving those tables right there?" He looks at me and says "Um, I am not moving anything". I just stare at him like F off, and he points to someone to go talk to. So I talk to the owner(?) with a sour ass puss look on his face. He has no idea either, he points me to the woman selling purses who is the organizer of this lovely affair. Earlier she didn’t know either, so I go back to her. She isn’t really sure. 10-15 minus maybe, is her answer. Um ok. So now I am pissed I look at my friend who so graciously came up there to keep me company and we go sit back down. As I am looking around, I realize that there are no more 'ladies night' patrons here. I haven’t seen a 'customer' come through the 'trade show' area for some time now and looking around the bar, it’s all dudes who think dancing is 'gay' and like 5 chicks. UMmm, yea...no one here is going to want to take this lesson. So needleless to say, I told the chick running this thing, that we're not doing the lesson. There is no one here to take it, and the regular bar folk are not interested in taking a salsa lesson after listening to Ted Nugent and Guns N' Roses. I am not willing to look like an A-Hole for this. She agreed, and we went back to our post.

A few minutes later I notice the other vendors packing up, so I take that opportunity to pack up myself. I pull the car around to hoist the TV I have on the table out to the car. As I am carrying it through and out one door, my friend is trying to get around me to open the second door to get out to the parking lot. Mind you, a man came through the door, scooted to the side to let me through while my friend is trying to get to the door before I drop the TV on my 3 inch heeled toe. WTF. I say "NO, Maybe this MAN could open the door for us". I said it as snotty as you know I can, and that is when he realized he was a douche and opened the door after saying "ohhh?!" Yep. I'm surprised he didn’t try to trudge on by me nearly knocking me over. Oh ya, and the door guy? Conveniently walked away. Nice chivalry. I should just say nice 'everyday politeness' you people have.

I should mention that my waitress was very nice and personable. You wouldn’t think so considering they make the girls dress like this is a fancy nightclub in tight silk dresses and stuff, but she was adorable. There was a guy (boy?) who worked there as maybe a bar back or something, who was very very nice and wanted to make sure I talked to the correct people while hunting down the owner(?) and kept asking me if I found him and if I settled everything. Those two are the ones who probably should have run this thing. They were the smartest most 'customer service' friendly people there. I wish I had his name; I'd totally call and praise him.

So, really the moral of this story is...have your shit together when planning events, and open doors for people, not only women, you see with their hands full or with heavy objects like a normal polite person.

Maybe I am Paranoid, but....

Today started off really good. I got up, got things done, worked out (finally!) and went to work. At that point it went downhill. I didn’t want to go to work. Which is rare these days because I actually like my jobs, and like to go to them, but I have a really big feeling I will be in severe need of a vacation by midsummer. So, traffic was of course horrendous going to work, at 2 frickin 30 in the afternoon, and I started to get the "have to eat" headache at work while helping someone. So finally, I get to go home, and I pull into my spot and pop my trunk. I get out of my car and some idiot (man) talks to me from out of nowhere. I jump, say "Jesus!" and he said "do you need help" UMMMMMMAH. After I jumped he realized he scared the crap out of me, and apologized. I said "ok then, I’m fine" and he kept going on and on. "I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I was just trying to help" and I am all like, (and say) "ok, but byeeee! Get away" Even though he was sloooowly continuing to walk. So he continues to say "I just like to brighten every girl’s day and show them their beauty" OK freak. So at this moment, I accidentally, or maybe in involuntary defense mode, set off my panic button on my car. This in turn scares HIM and he says "omg, that is loud, is that you". I say "yep it is, it’s my panic button, so byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee". At this point, I grab the litter, walk quickly to my door, saying "OK! OK! OK!" as he continues to walk and talk (not by me). I feel a bit at ease, seeing my neighbor peeking out of his door wall at the commotion, and I get in and slam the door....safely.

What in the F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You’d think I took a Hallucinogenic last night

What my dream consisted of last night:

To start, was with Vera and Ang. We were visiting Vera’s home town which for some reason was Kalamazoo or something. So, we were going somewhere there, and to get there, we had to kick paddle through a “no wake zone” kind of canal thing on pillows. You know, like boogie board kick paddling, but on pillows. Then every time I hit a small wave, I fell in. So, instead of getting out of the no wake zone and into the lake, we came to a sidewalk/neighborhood/walking area. Don’t ask me, I’m just regurgitating. So then we get onto the walk and I see a sign. High School 16 miles. So, I get really pissed asking Vera…”are we SERIOUSLY going to go to your old high school. This is so lame.” They were like “yea, um, we’re running/jogging there”. Oh awesome, because I do not run anywhere. Sooo, I snottily say “well, are you going to wait there for me since I will be miles behind both of you?” And I start to jog.

I am jogging down this 16 mile road of trees, shops, businesses, and such to get to this ‘dumb’ high school and left them behind. So meantime, every now and again there is a checkpoint or a resting stop for water, or Jon Lajoie merchandise. Apparently he is the feature or hometown hero of this town or is performing there and everyone is either excited or doesn’t care. I can’t be sure, but I know I’m pleasantly surprised because I stop to purchase my Jon Lajoie water at the first rest stop. So I keep jogging and I make it to the mile mark, which seems like the 5 mile mark, and go in the shop and purchase my Jon Lajoie Bicep coin holder. (?!). Yes, it wraps around your arm to hold coins. Like when you’re working out and you can strap your MP3 player on your arm, it was for coins. So, at this point I have to go back home for something, so I get in the car and drive home. Car? I thought I just kick paddled on a pillow, and ran to get there. But no, I went to my home which was some way different apartment that what is actually mine, and my mom and dad are there.

They have just decided to have a renewal of vows ceremony in 2 weeks. So, I panic and have to go to work, to tell my boss, and see who will cover for my shifts for that weekend. The kicker is, the store where I work, (it is supposed to be the store I work in real life), is creepy, has crazy haunting things happening there, and I hate going there (in my dream). Also the manager at the store, in my dream, is not my store manager, but the spa manager where I also work in real life. It was flip flopped. The store looked like an old funeral home. Open floor, windows all around with big heavy curtains darkening the store from the sun. The haunting was the part where the ghost or whatever would shut and open the curtains at its leisure, or slam the safe shut. It was frightening stuff, folks.

So then, in the midst of some unnecessary stress over my parent’s renewals, I had to deal with estranged family members and finding out I am related to the Kardashians. I found them working at a drycleaners down the road, and that we have all kinds of cousins we didn’t know existed. So there was a teary reunion. Mind you, I have no idea who these people were, since they weren’t the real Kardashian's.

I have no idea how this treat of a dream ended because I woke up in a sweat. Good god, where did all THAT come from??