You’d think I took a Hallucinogenic last night

What my dream consisted of last night:

To start, was with Vera and Ang. We were visiting Vera’s home town which for some reason was Kalamazoo or something. So, we were going somewhere there, and to get there, we had to kick paddle through a “no wake zone” kind of canal thing on pillows. You know, like boogie board kick paddling, but on pillows. Then every time I hit a small wave, I fell in. So, instead of getting out of the no wake zone and into the lake, we came to a sidewalk/neighborhood/walking area. Don’t ask me, I’m just regurgitating. So then we get onto the walk and I see a sign. High School 16 miles. So, I get really pissed asking Vera…”are we SERIOUSLY going to go to your old high school. This is so lame.” They were like “yea, um, we’re running/jogging there”. Oh awesome, because I do not run anywhere. Sooo, I snottily say “well, are you going to wait there for me since I will be miles behind both of you?” And I start to jog.

I am jogging down this 16 mile road of trees, shops, businesses, and such to get to this ‘dumb’ high school and left them behind. So meantime, every now and again there is a checkpoint or a resting stop for water, or Jon Lajoie merchandise. Apparently he is the feature or hometown hero of this town or is performing there and everyone is either excited or doesn’t care. I can’t be sure, but I know I’m pleasantly surprised because I stop to purchase my Jon Lajoie water at the first rest stop. So I keep jogging and I make it to the mile mark, which seems like the 5 mile mark, and go in the shop and purchase my Jon Lajoie Bicep coin holder. (?!). Yes, it wraps around your arm to hold coins. Like when you’re working out and you can strap your MP3 player on your arm, it was for coins. So, at this point I have to go back home for something, so I get in the car and drive home. Car? I thought I just kick paddled on a pillow, and ran to get there. But no, I went to my home which was some way different apartment that what is actually mine, and my mom and dad are there.

They have just decided to have a renewal of vows ceremony in 2 weeks. So, I panic and have to go to work, to tell my boss, and see who will cover for my shifts for that weekend. The kicker is, the store where I work, (it is supposed to be the store I work in real life), is creepy, has crazy haunting things happening there, and I hate going there (in my dream). Also the manager at the store, in my dream, is not my store manager, but the spa manager where I also work in real life. It was flip flopped. The store looked like an old funeral home. Open floor, windows all around with big heavy curtains darkening the store from the sun. The haunting was the part where the ghost or whatever would shut and open the curtains at its leisure, or slam the safe shut. It was frightening stuff, folks.

So then, in the midst of some unnecessary stress over my parent’s renewals, I had to deal with estranged family members and finding out I am related to the Kardashians. I found them working at a drycleaners down the road, and that we have all kinds of cousins we didn’t know existed. So there was a teary reunion. Mind you, I have no idea who these people were, since they weren’t the real Kardashian's.

I have no idea how this treat of a dream ended because I woke up in a sweat. Good god, where did all THAT come from??